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The Shaolin Journey - Part 1

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  • The Shaolin Journey - Part 1

    Dear Shaolin Wahnam Family,

    It seems the right time to share the writings about my experiences and practice during these past year. I started just one year ago and I would like to share them with you. They are not statements of truth but just thoughts and reflections of my journey in this beautiful path. I hope you enjoy them! :-)


    Second Shaolin Law: “Required to train the Shaolin arts diligently, and as a pre-requisite, to be physically and mentally healthy.”

    The more I train the more I understand why this is one of the 10 Shaolin Laws. From direct experience, I understand how health can greatly affect my training, life and progress.

    I still remember when I started practicing Shaolin Kungfu back in 2010. I didn’t take it to the level I am taking my Taijiquan now. I can clearly see how different my practice was by then. I am now far more aware of Chi and Chi Flow during my practice. I am also aware of many things that I wasn’t before. For example, the 6 harmonies. How special is my practice and life whenever I am able to feel those 6 harmonies!

    The interesting thing is that the deeper the practice gets the easier is to over practice or to deviate in my practice. Before, I could easily train 45 minutes and everything was alright. Right now, if I practice Taijiquan every single day I feel over training straight away and I will have a very uncomfortable cleansing. In fact, if my sessions last more than 15 minutes for many consecutive days I will go through serious adverse effects. Sifu is so right when he mentions that “Many times less is more”.

    Surprisingly, right now I just practice Flowing Water Floating Clouds Set once or twice a week. That seems to be more than enough for my level of development. I can clearly see that if one has deep blockages the amount of energy that this set is bringing could have serious negative effects.

    Before, I could not understand why cleansing was so important and why health was an essential part of progress at all stages of my training. I still remember watching kung fu movies and hearing the saying: “How can you fill your cup if is already full? Empty your cup”. This made perfect sense to me. It was an "aha" experience and I understood why Bodhidharma taught the monks how to become healthy first and then search for enlightenment.

    I was full of anger, sadness, pain, fear, anxiety and bad thoughts. There wasn't space for health, love, peace, joy, confidence, courage and faith. How could I bring the good if I was not letting go from all the rubbish that I had inside of me? How could I progress if I wasn't healthy?

    Right now, it is like if tons of things are coming out of my body. If I have to put an analogy, I would say that, whenever I start doing a Chi Flow, it is like opening the Tap. It is a flow of things coming out from my body and something is pushing them out. The more I cleanse the more I want to cleanse. The more I cleanse the more is coming out and the stronger the feeling of flow.

    It is true that, once I keep emptying the cup that was already full, I can learn things much faster and I can feel more new Chi coming to my body and replace the old Chi. I understand now what Sifu meant when he was explaining that I don't lose Chi but I replace the old Chi for the new Good Chi and it feels so good!

    To be continued...
    Last edited by sancrica; 1 September 2014, 03:34 PM. Reason: Grammar :-)

  • #2
    Nice post, beautiful to read. I really like this:

    The more I cleanse the more I want to cleanse. The more I cleanse the more is coming out and the stronger the feeling of flow.

    All the best,


    • #3
      The Shaolin Journey - Part 2

      Thank you for you kind words Nick Sijat (Is this family name correct?), they are very much appreciated. :-)


      “If you knew how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought.” - Peace Pilgrim

      In my today’s practice I realized the importance of thoughts and experiences that I encountered in my life. In my recent practices I have been able to see many experiences from my past. Dreams are becoming very vivid and they are taking me to past events that happened long time ago.

      I was very surprised to see how much I can remember from my past. I believed all those experiences were totally forgotten. I realized that everything that happens in my life leaves a footprint in my spirit. It is not about the size of the experience itself. Even the smallest and the most insignificant things of my past showed up in my practice, daily life and dreams. I could remember them with absolute detail.

      Being aware of this makes me feel very careful about what I think, say or act. It makes me understand that everything that happens in my life is a continuation of what I think, say or act and that is why I have to take very good care of my thoughts, words and actions.

      I once heard a nice quote that sums up what I felt: “Our lives are a sum total of the choices we have made”. - Wayne Dyer

      To be continued...


      • #4
        The Shaolin Journey - Part 3


        "After this chi flow, and after every chi flow, your soul is slightly purer." - Sifu

        Lately, things are getting really deep. For some reason, after more than 15 years, I enjoy going to church and pray. I visit a church in Dublin City Center called “St Teresa’s Church”. When I enter into that church I always feel an incredible peace, protection and care.

        Since about two years ago, every time that I enter in a temple I feel very emotional and spiritually touched. The feeling gets much stronger when I enter into a Buddhist Temple and listen monks praying. When I hear them praying I start crying in a very special way. It feels like the whole universe is crying. It feels like to whole universe is manifesting in the crying. I can feel how every single cell inside of me is crying. It is like if the whole universe is listening. It feels at home.

        I sense a heavenly protection and a blanket of care and love that covers my pain and sorrow. It feels like a mother comforting a child when he gets hurt. Then, I cry and cry until the pain goes. I feel understood, I feel supported, I feel the presence of something bigger than me and something infinite. I feel that there is no reason to feel afraid.

        It is very true that, after every practice, I feel purer. I often wonder where all this pain and sorrow is coming from. They keep leaving my body day by day and I can feel a tremendous flow with it. It is surprising and shocking to see how much I was keeping inside and I often wonder if one person of my young age can actually accumulate all that in a lifetime. That was one of the reasons why I started to believe that other lives would make a lot of sense.

        I don’t think that I have been suffering in this life so much. After practicing Chi Kung for more than 8 years the pain, sorrow and sadness keep coming out like if they were infinite and endless. I must confess that I sometimes cannot cope with all the emotions that I am going through and I think about stopping. When desperation, solitude and loneliness come an incredible force makes me keep going and cares for me. I then feel like if my mother was hugging me near the fireplace in a cold winter day.

        I often wonder how much is behind the scenes. When I can pick up these moments of peace, I wonder if heaven is that way or even purer. In these moments it is like, just for an instant, everything makes perfect sense and helps me keep going. It is like watching a movie trailer. I cannot see the whole movie but I can see a preview. Those experiences nourish my spirit and create a path that lead and guide me towards "the whole movie".

        I have recently discovered that it is very easy to pray. I haven’t been doing this since a long time ago. The reason why I am doing it now is simply because I really enjoy doing it. It is like feeling connected through the WIFI to the “Big Network”. When I pray I feel how my whole body is praying. It feels like if all the cells are praying at the same time. It is really intense and powerful. It feels as a pending task that needed to be done since long time ago.

        In the praying I can sense how all the experiences that I have had in my life left a print in my spirit. I sometimes see moments in my life that I thought I had totally forgotten. If those experiences left a negative print in my spirit I can feel a pain like if it was just happening again. Then I am given the chance to heal that pain and it goes away. It also happens that positive experiences come into my mind. I can keep that wonderful feeling with me, revive it again and nourish my spirit.

        To be continued...


        • #5
          The Shaolin Journey - Part 4


          “We may have bad weather in Ireland, but the sun shines in the hearts of the people and that keeps us all warm.” - Marianne Williamson

          It is very interesting to see that many people come to Ireland in order to heal themselves. I have been almost three years in this beautiful land and I have seen many people landing here in the search of a path. I found this land to be a healer, to be a candle in the darkness.

          Since I arrived in Ireland, I had the feeling that I had been in this place before. I always felt at home and never alone, isolated or even sad about the weather.

          Sije has accepted me in her wonderful Irish Wahnam Family and I own her so much that I won’t probably be able to pay her back.

          When I moved out of Spain the most essential requisite for me was to have the Shaolin Wahnam Institute present in the country that I was going to live in. With time I understood that I wasn’t in Ireland by chance. I had to meet Sije and receive the teachings from her. Thanks to her I started Taijiquan and many more wonderful benefits will come as the time was passing by.

          As Sije’s birthday is coming soon, I composed this song for her as a way to thank her generosity. It is also dedicated to this beautiful land that opened my heart’s doors in such a profound way:

          To be continued...


          • #6
            The Shaolin Journey - Part 5


            “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” - Mahatma Gandhi

            “When you are grateful - when you can see what you have - you unlock blessings to flow in your life.” - Suze Orman

            The more I forgive, the stronger I feel. I have discovered through my own practice that forgiving is one of the strongest tools that I have in my hands. The more I forgive the more I am able to forgive. The more I forgive the more I flow with life. The more I forgive the more content I feel. The more I forgive the more I receive.

            The more blessings I send the more blessed I feel. There more blessings I send the more in peace I feel. The more blessings I send the more free I feel.

            “The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it.”
            ― J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan: Fairy Tales

            “So come with me, where dreams are born, and time is never planned. Just think of happy things, and your heart will fly on wings, forever, in Never Never Land!”
            ― J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan: Fairy Tales

            For some reason, Peter Pan’s tail has been resonating in me for a while. One day, after one of my Chi Kung practices I was thinking about how lost children needed to find “a happy thought” in order to be able to fly. I then thought about the similarity that this had with "Smiling from the Heart". That happy thought was unlocking children’s heart so they could fly in the very same way that “Smiling from the Heart” unlocked me so I could “fly” and flow with life.

            In my Chi Kung early days, when Sifu was telling me to “Smile from the heart”, I just couldn’t follow this simple instruction. All I could do was to find the happiest thought that I had available and start from there. After finding that happy thought I was gradually able to smile from the heart. Smiling from the heart has now become so natural and effortless that seems strange to have used a happy thought in order to follow this simple instruction.

            I was not surprised to find Sifu’s wisdom in this classic and in many others. Genuine wisdom is always around. I was just unable to see it. Now, I can catch a little bit more. Things keep simplifying and I can see that same wisdom is just explained in different ways.

            To be continued...

            Peter Pan and Happy Thought.jpg


            • #7
              The Shaolin Journey - Part 6


              “With Chi Kung, anything you do you will do better”. - Sifu

              I remember Sifu saying that, if we feel that we are over training or have too much energy, we can expend more time doing outdoors activities. I felt today like if I just needed to run. I don’t usually run. In fact, I think that I hadn’t run for the past 6 or 9 months. The surprising thing was to experience how I kept running and running for an hour and I arrived home without feeling tired. In fact, I felt rested, fresh, full of energy and relaxed.

              I don’t think that people would actually believe that I am not training for running because they wouldn’t believe that I was able to run for an hour without some kind of practice. The thing is that I was not only able to run for an hour, I was also able to arrive home with more energy than when I started. I am very sure that if I tell anyone this statement they would think that I am just lying.

              “I go wherever my creativity takes me”. - Lil Wayne

              Shaolin Arts are unlocking my creativity in ways that I thought I would never experience. Being able to create something is an amazing feeling of flow and freedom. I always had the feeling that it was not me the one creating and that I was just a channel. It feels so good manifesting those creations. It makes me feel closer to God.

              Here is just a little poem that I wrote in this state of mind:

              It feels alive when I can breath, when I can walk inside the myth.
              It feels inside, the pain is gone, the road is there when I am grown.
              It feels the same when it is not, I just discovered I have a lot.
              It feels inside, it feels outside, I just let go and enjoy the ride.

              It means a lot, it means to me, it means to earth I now can see.
              It means the life, it means the death, I just don’t know until the last breath.
              It means the sky it means the bird, it means the bottom of this down earth.
              It means the limit in endless ways, I wait with patience for better days.

              I see it now but not before, there is a time to reach the core.
              I see it now, I see the light, sometimes is warm and also bright.
              I see the hope I see the love, in the creation and all above.
              I see the faith in all I do, I found the strength I hope you too.


              (Picture taken from destinystudio)

              To be continued...


              • #8
                The Shaolin Journey - Part 7

                Nan-in, a Japanese master during the Meiji era (1868-1912), received a university professor who came to inquire about Zen.

                Nan-in served tea. He poured his visitor's cup full, and then kept on pouring.

                The professor watched the overflow until he no longer could restrain himself. "It is overfull. No more will go in!"

                "Like this cup," Nan-in said, "you are full of your own opinions and speculations. How can I show you Zen unless you first empty your cup?"

                Not very long time ago I just realised about this important fact. How can I pretend to practice good Kung Fu if my cup is already full? My cup is full of anger, full of hate, full of sadness and full of frustration. Though I have been practicing now Chi Kung for many years, it seems like an endless wave of negative emotions are flashing out of my body in every Chi Kung practice. Sometimes, the negative emotions are so strong that I start wondering how much a single person can keep in the inside.

                In fact, this is one of the reasons why I started believing in other lives. Such an amount of repressed emotions could not be accumulated in only 35 years. Some of this emotions are like vivid memories of experiences that I have never lived in this life. For example, I have always been afraid of being accused of stealing. For some reason, I have been always scared of being caught while stealing though I never steal. I have always wondered where that fear was coming from.

                Second Shaolin Law often comes to my mind. I now understand that good Kung Fu cannot come if I am not healthy enough. Good Kung Fu comes from health. Good Kung Fu comes from an open heart. Good Kung Fu comes from an empty cup.

                I am in a moment where I just need to empty that cup. It is like a tremendous flow pushing it all out. I cannot say that it is always pleasant as sometimes negative emotions could be quite intense. When I feel overwhelmed help is always coming and I am very happy that it does as that greatly helps me to keep going.

                Empty Cup.jpg

                (Picture taken from adventuresingiftedness)

                To be continued...
                Last edited by sancrica; 25 September 2014, 09:05 AM. Reason: misspelling :-)


                • #9

                  My friend, i too have noticed these same things..I would like to mention that after 54 yrs i have come to see that without previous lives most of us experienced more than we realize.

                  Much of it is trapped in our bodies , subconscious etc... A great master i had the privilege of training with for many years, Hameed Ali, said more than once, " If you knew all the barriers

                  and blockages you carry in the beginning it would be so depressing as to make you give up." [loose quote as he told me when i was pretty out there at the time..]

                  Point being is just stay present with what arises and enjoy the ride, let it flow and let it go..

                  Just last nite i became aware of a fear i had not seen clearly before, and realized again that my thinking mind cannot solve this. I watched it from my flowing aliveness and it

                  just became insignificant, just like that..Whatever lifetime it was from, it was nothing compared to just being in the now.....

                  Not long ago i was just amazed and stunned at how many 'veils' there are, not worried just amazed..It was almost comical..Again it became clear that being with whatever is here

                  in the moment with an open heart is the real option, the real 'solution' in a way..

                  We are very fortunate to train these arts which make the journey so much more joyful, even when these things arise. I am thankful at my good fortune..

                  Warmly Gusty


                  • #10
                    Thank you :-)

                    Dear Gusty Sidai,

                    Thank you very much for your wonderful post and for your contributions. I truly feel what you mean. :-)

                    I have to admit that cleansing has changed very much since I have attended the Small and Big Universe Course. I will never become tired of saying what a wonderful course that is!

                    Luckily, this heavy cleansing does not occur anymore.

                    In fact, when I was reading the journal that I started one year ago I was feeling deeply surprised of all the processes that I went through in just one year term and all the progress that I have made so far.

                    Sometimes my writings reflect that heavy cleansing and I was questioning myself if I should share in the Forum some of those posts and experiences. I finally decided to share all of it as it is truly coming from the heart and they are part of the healing process.

                    I have enjoyed so much to read other students testimonials and they have been so incredibly enriching for my own practice that it is really a honour if my journal can inspire and help someone. :-)

                    As a Sifu's student that I am it is the least I can do for a life of complete dedication, compassion and love.

                    I just came from Alicante courses and I am so deeply touched. I was very lucky to witness a celebration that made me aware of how much Sifu has done for me and for so many people. Sifu has saved so many lives and enriched the life of so many people...

                    Those courses and celebrations have strengthen my link with Sifu. I feel so lucky to have him in my life! I honestly don't know what would I do if I didn't have Sifu in my life. He saved me in so many ways that there is a deep feeling of gratitude in my heart that wants to show him how much I appreciate what he has done for me.

                    With Love, Care and Shaolin Salute,



                    • #11
                      Dear Sisook Santi and Sisook Gusty,

                      Fabulous posts. Thank you both so much for sharing your experiences here on the forum.

                      Like all great experiences that are offered for public viewing here on the Shaolin Forum, everyone learns from them and everyone benefits from them. And our heartfelt gratitude to our Sifu and Sigung, and all the Great Past Masters, grows even stronger.

                      The Small Universe in Toronto was indeed a most beautiful experience. It was an honour and a privilege to share it with the both of you.

                      All the best,



                      • #12
                        Oh ...and I really liked the tea picture as well Santi!


                        • #13
                          Dear Santiago.

                          Thank You so much. It touched me so deeply yesterday. I have no words to describe it correctly...


                          • #14
                            The Shaolin Journey - Part 8

                            Thank you for your kind words. They are very much appreciated. :-)


                            Sometimes I wonder why God gave me the life he gave me. I know that it is because he loves me. Just sometimes, when I am living a roller coaster of emotions, I need a little bit more of faith.

                            Many times, I just want to cry until I feel empty. Then, I start crying and crying and it never feels empty. It is like expecting that a fountain stops bringing water.

                            I feel that something really special is reserved for me in this life. I always felt it that way. I have been going from one place to another like a ship led by the wind.

                            I really have faith in God now. It wasn’t always that way. I lost my faith when I started to grow and I forgot the light that his presence used to bring me. For some reason, I let myself believe that God wasn’t worth it. I think that this is why these past ten years he has been giving me a lesson. He wanted me next to him. He wanted a good life for me. He wanted me back.

                            I can see now that his hand has been helping me when I felt lost. I can see now but not before. I thank him for it. I admit that my faith has some gaps but my faith is growing and is getting really strong. I made myself the promise of trusting God no matter what. I know that I will get what I am asking if that is the best for me. If I don’t get it, it is because there is something better reserved for me.

                            Dear God, I am learning. Please, give me strength and give me the patience for enjoying my waiting. What I just want is to be with you, by your side and share your light with the world. I know that I am not ready yet. That is why I ask every day for your help, advice and wisdom. I need your guide so I don’t get lost again.

                            When I feel you in my heart I am not afraid anymore. I feel at home and I feel that nothing else needs to be done. I belong to everything. When I have those feelings, I feel that the world is full of your light. When I experience your greatness I feel that the world is perfect the way it is. It is a release to know that this is the way it has to be.

                            I kindly ask you that, whenever I am wrong, you send me a sign so I can correct my direction. Please, let me use this life for getting the best out of it. Let me love and feel loved. Let me feel and be felt. Let me see and be seen. Let me smile and be smiled at. Let me touch and be touched. I sometimes feel a bit lonely.

                            I patiently wait for my heart to be fixed. I work a little bit everyday and I trust Sifu and Sije and do what they say. I thank you for bringing them to my side. Without their help I don’t know where I would be right now. Thank you for bringing me your light through them. I have no words for what you have done for me.

                            I want them to be proud of me. I just want to show them that all of their efforts are worth it. Sometimes I feel that I am a really slow student and I can see that they have to be very patient with me.

                            I feel that Sije prays for me all the time. I can feel the blessings that she sends me. That is why for me she is very special. I feel like a little bird under her wings when is cold and it is raining. I really value to have her by my side. I sometimes want to hug her just to say thank you.

                            When I feel her blessings, they come from the sky like a warm summer night. I can feel that my journey is going to have a happy end. She is an incredible master full of love and compassion. I am learning so much from her that I don’t know if I will ever be able to pay her back.

                            I often think that all my difficulties and sufferings led me to them. I am letting these feelings go because I know now that I met them thanks to that. I would go again through all that suffering if I had to just to be next to them. That gives me strength in life because I know now that God sometimes uses these lessons for correcting my journey and take me to the best place that I can be.

                            I listen more often to my heart now. When I do, I feel like at home. I feel a flow of love and compassion that makes me really happy. When I feel the flow of love I feel complete and content.

                            Please, take me always by your side so I can flow with your guidance. Teach me in a way that I can understand. I promise to be the best that is in my hands. I don’t want to be scared and afraid anymore. Help me to feel your light when I am lost so I know where to go next.

                            I promise you that I will always do good and that I will help others to release their suffering if you give me the chance. That would be my way of repaying what you have done for me.

                            Please, heal me in a way that I know that I cannot get more out of this life. Heal me in a way that I can shine like the sun shines in a summer day. Heal me in a way that my presence releases suffering from the people that I share my life with. Heal me in a way that I can receive your message through music, writing or any other way of art that inspires me and the people.

                            I am listening now and I promise that I will always be listening so I can hear when you speak to me. That is my promise. I now have faith in you.

                            Light Always goes Through.jpg

                            (Picture taken from freehdw)

                            To be continued...


                            • #15
                              The Shaolin Journey - Part 9


                              “You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with.” - Wayne Dyer

                              For some unexplainable reason I need to be alone when I have the chance. When I am alone I feel that I can heal my emotional wounds. I really enjoy being alone. Lately, I watch a lot of movies from my childhood. I am going back in time connecting with many parts of my spirit.

                              It is an incredible, touching and humbling experience feeling how everything that I have done in my life has left a mark in the deepest part of my spirit. That makes me understand on the importance of good thoughts.

                              By expending this time alone I am able to recover from old wounds that have been there since a very long time. Reaching them makes me feel very emotional and, at the same time, makes me feel incredibly loved. When I reach the most hurt part of my spirit I feel a warm and comforting hug that releases my suffering.

                              I know that I am not alone anymore because I feel the love all around me. It is like the love of a mother multiplied by infinite. It is the kind of love that heals everything with no questions but pure compassion.

                              I also have the need of going every week to church. Though I have never been very religious I feel like at home when I visit the church. When I pray in the church I can feel this warm love again and makes me keep praying and asking for help.

                              I know now that I need a lot of help to heal my spirit. There are many things that I want to cure through this immense power that is coming to me. The more I accept this force in my life the more it is coming to me. This force heals my spirit in ways I cannot explain but only feel.

                              I would like to spend more time with my friends but I really need to spend time alone. It is the only place where I can connect with this force and ask for help. It heals me in such a deep level that I feel an incredible gratitude every time that it happens.

                              Some people don’t understand this stage of my life. I really need to go through this. I feel like if I have been waiting for this opportunity since a long time ago. My heart is speaking to me louder than ever. My heart is my guide and tells me that I am following the right path.

                              Life is starting to feel magical again. I had forgotten that feeling. I sometimes feel like if I was in a fairy tail. I now feel that I am the main character of my very own story. It is sometimes an overwhelming feeling as I know that no one will ever live life the way I live it. Every life is unique and precious!

                              I want to absorb life like the sand absorbs water in a desert. I am already 34 years old and those years went so fast... I don’t have time to lose. Every single moment is so precious and unique. I will never experience any moment in the very same way. That is why every single one is so valuable to me. All of them lead me home and feels like the Shooting Star that took the Three Kings to Belem.

                              I am really happy that all of this is happening. I have had the incredible opportunity to improve my life in a way that I would have never imagined. It truly is a golden opportunity, a precious gem. Sometimes is overwhelming but it is always worth it. I thank God for that.

                              Opening to God.jpg

                              (Picture taken from tinybuddha)

                              To be continued...